Q&A: Dr. Lisa Diamond,
Professor - Psychology,  Gender Studies

Dr. Lisa Diamond, professor of psychology and gender studies, brings her expertise on sexuality, gender and intimate relationships to the forthcoming documentary, Lover of Men: The Untold History of Abraham Lincoln. Featured recently in a Vanity Fair article about the film, Dr. Diamond was invited by the filmmakers for her extensive research on human sexuality to help examine a lesser-known aspect of Abraham Lincoln's life—his intimate relationships with men. Through her contributions, the film challenges modern perceptions of sexual identity and offers a nuanced understanding of how figures like Lincoln may have navigated their relationships in an era when concepts of sexual orientation were very different from today. Dr. Diamond's insights provide a compelling lens through which we can explore the cultural and historical significance of Lincoln's same-sex relationships, enriching our understanding of his humanity and legacy.

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How did you come to be involved Lover of Men: The Untold History of Abraham Lincoln, and what drew you to this aspect of Abraham Lincoln's life?

The filmmakers contacted me because of my extensive research on sexual fluidity, and on the phenomenon of individuals periodically engaging in same-sex behavior without identifying as gay. I've also done a lot of research on "passionate friendships," intent same-sex friendships that often developed in the 1900s, and which had all of the features that modern observers associate with romantic-sexual relationships (long love letters, living together, holding hands), but were not always explicitly sexual. The filmmakers were interested in trying to understand Lincoln's same-sex sexuality in the context of what was known and understood about sexual orientation at that time – which was basically nothing! One of the questions they had tried to address in the film is "does it even make sense to call someone like Lincoln gay?" And I think that it's almost impossible for us to use our modern notions of sexual orientation to understand how individuals in previous historical periods understood their same-sex behavior.


Why is it important to investigate and discuss the sexuality of historical figures like Abraham Lincoln? How does this contribute to our understanding of history and identity?

From a scientific perspective, when we are trying to understand something like sexual orientation, we are trying to differentiate between forms of sexual expression that are culturally driven and forms of sexual expression that appear to occur in all cultures and historical periods, and which therefore seem to represent something about human nature. And so, one of the things that's valuable about the Lincoln case is that the behavior seems pretty self-evident: this was an important, passionate, loving relationship between these two men, and it was strong enough to provoke great distress in Lincoln when they separated and Speed got engaged.  One of the things that I teach in my current undergraduate course on "love and relationships" (Psych/Gndr/SBS 1080) is that when anthropologists first studied whether "romantic love" was a universal human phenomenon (versus an invention of Western culture), they searched existing ethnographic records for the feelings and behaviors associated with romantic love: Specifically, people longing to be together, expressing great distress when separated, making sacrifices to be together (sometimes running away together), and writing letters and poetry about their intense feelings.  And sure enough, they found these behaviors in nearly all cultures that are represented in the Standard Cross-Cultural Sample (which comprises a group of cultures that represent the broadest representation of human variation on the planet). So even when a culture didn’t have the same words and definitions for “love” as we do in the modern West, it was clear that they did experience those basic human feelings.  I think the same is true with respect to same-sex sexuality.  Just about everywhere we have looked for “queer people” (i.e., across different cultures and historical periods), we have found them, and yet in almost all historical and cross-cultural cases, the behavior that we observe is best characterized as bisexual, because usually you find that individuals pursue same-sex behavior and relationships alongside (and not instead of) other-sex behavior and relationships.  This helps to explain why so many of these cases appear relatively hidden from view – as long as individuals were behaving the way that they were "supposed to," according to the social dictates of their community, people didn’t worry so much about what else they might be doing.  So when we look at historical figures like Lincoln, it helps us to see that he was actually living quite similarly to the way people with same-sex interests have lived throughout history – they may not have called themselves “gay” and they may not have considered themselves “different” in some important way, but they were simply following their feelings and desires.  Those feelings and desires are a universal part of the human experience.  And so, I hope that this film helps to underscore that long before there was an “LGBTQ movement” or “LGBTQ community,” there have always been individuals falling deeply and passionately and erotically in love with same-gender partners. 

How does the historical context of Lincoln’s era, including the social stigmas around homosexuality, inform our psychological understanding of his relationships and the ways in which he might have navigated his identity?

I think it's quite possible that Lincoln never spent any time at all thinking about his "identity!”  Our modern preoccupation with understanding our own identities may sometimes bias us to think that everyone has always been obsessed with sexual identity, but it just wasn’t true!  Individual differences in sexuality just weren’t things that folks talked about or analyzed. What happened behind closed doors generally stayed behind closed doors. So I think it's impossible for us to know whether Lincoln even reflected on his feelings and behaviors and viewed them as "wrong," or "unusual,” because the very idea of sexual “essences” wasn’t a part of the culture. 

How do psychologists approach the challenge of interpreting the sexuality of historical figures like Lincoln, who lived in a time before modern understandings of sexual orientation existed? What are the ethical considerations in such interpretations?

I think that both psychologists and historians are appropriately cautious about interpreting the sexuality of historical figures, because we are limited to whatever documents and artifacts have survived over time, and many of those documents and artifacts just don't contain the type of information that we would need. And as I mentioned above, there is no way to just "transpose" modern notions of sexual orientation onto a different culture and different historical epoch. So I think that when psychologists like myself and when historians (like those in the film) comment and observe features of Lincoln’s private life, we’re not actually able to interpret “Lincoln’s sexuality.”  We can only observe his words and behaviors. And so, we can observe that these words and behaviors resemble those of a same-sex love affair, but we can't ever say definitively that we "know" Lincoln’s sexuality.  

How do you anticipate the public will respond to the idea that Abraham Lincoln may have had romantic or sexual relationships with men? What impact do you think this will have on his legacy?

I’m quite certain many individuals will object to the notion that Lincoln had romantic/sexual relationships with men, probably because we’re living in a period where arguments about LGBTQ issues have become particularly fraught.  But the plain truth is that individuals are more likely to be open about their same-sex desires and relationships now, in 2024, than in any period of human history.  Presently, approximately 20% of GenZ describe themselves as somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum (which includes, notably, the category of ‘mostly-but-not-completely-heterosexual’), and I have heard many individuals ask "what's going on? Where did all these queer people come from?” And the answer, of course, is “they were there all along, it’s just that not all of them were seen and acknowledged.” This is one way to understand the Lincoln case as well. Nothing in the historical record changed, it’s just that we see it differently now, we have better scientific and cultural frameworks within which to understand it.  For example, the fact that Lincoln had such a strong heterosexual marriage is often used as evidence that he could not possibly have been attracted to men.  But once we started collecting reliable, representative data on individuals with different patterns of attraction (around early 2000’s) it quickly became clear that bisexual patterns of attraction were far more common than exclusively same-sex patterns of attraction.  Which means that knowing someone has an active and vibrant heterosexual marriage tells you nothing about whether they also have the capacity for same-sex attractions!  But with regard to Lincoln’s legacy, I think the film shows that Lincoln clearly had a stunning and inspiring capacity for deep love and affection, and isn't that what we want to be true of our leaders?  

What do you hope the scholarly community and the public take away from this documentary? Do you think it will inspire further research or change how we approach the study of historical figures?

I hope that it inspires individuals to see historical figures as human beings, first and foremost, with all the complexities and contradictions and paradoxes that come with being human. And I hope that it gives all of us some degree of humility when we tried to interpret the thoughts, feelings, and perceptions of people in different cultures and historical epochs.  At the end of the day, none of us know what was going on in Lincoln’s mind, and none of us knows what really goes on in the hearts and minds of ANY couple.  But we know what attachment looks like, as a human phenomenon – the desire to cleave to another person, to follow them, to touch and soothe them, to rely on them in times of trouble, to resist being apart from them.  And observing Lincoln’s intense attachments to men and women during his life should give us an appreciation for his deep humanity.